About 3 months ago, my oldest daughter, JC, who is 8, made a little “name card” book in which she put names of our family members and corresponding short descriptions. This is what she wrote of my husband:
Whenever U need help call…..
DAD
What he does:
· Builds
· Drives
· Helps you in software tough spots
· Works in 3 different offices
· Loves his daughters a lot
And here is her description of me:
MOM
She is a professional…
Shopper (for clothes) • designer • grocer • make-up artist • artist • advertiser • cook • photographer • punisher • party planner • shoe collector • organizer • lover
How she got that last word, is beyond me… (I truly hope that she means it as I love my family a lot).
The fact is, I am all that and more. I NEED to be more.
One of my favorite poem is "Phenomenal Woman" by Toni Morrison: “…I am woman, phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, that’s me!...” and that is exactly what I want to be.
I want to be Phenomenal!
I want to be a phenomenal role model for my daughters & god daughter!
That’s what drives me.
I want to show them how to embrace this gift and curse we call womanhood. That a woman can be all that she can be without having to be embarrassed or create excuses for it. That we can have ambition beyond raising a family and yet still have a wonderful family. Bukannya karena saya perempuan super. Saya bukan wonder woman atau super hero lainnya. Saya cuma seorang ibu who wants her girls to grow up and be phenomenal. Therefore, I have to be phenomenal. I have to be their role model. Kalau bukan saya, siapa lagi?
Buat saya (dan saya yakin buat orang lain akan beda) untuk jadi Phenomenal, saya harus bisa melakukan hal-hal domestic yang sifatnya perempuan banget seperti masak, arts and craft, entertaining, being a good hostess sampe hal-hal yang sifatnya lebih maskulin seperti ganti ban, fixing things around the house, putting together IKEA furnitures dll. And I have to be able to do them well. Be a great educator for my kids. Embrace my femininity. Be an efficient manager (dari managing pembantu dan nannies sampai managing anak buah di kantor). Melakukan pekerjaan kantor saya dengan sangat baik to the point where my boss can’t function without me. Be successful in my enterprise. Have fun!!! Be well read and well informed. Cultivate friendships. Be organized. Appreciate the arts. Be smart. Pursue my hobbies. Be a creative force for those around me. Menjadi istri yang respectful, baik dan supportive. Maintain good health. Last but not least, do them all in style tentunya J. Banyak banget yaa… and yet I somehow manage to do them day in and day out.
Those are exactly the kinds of things I want my daughters to see me do. How a woman can create, be gentle, juggle, put out fires and look good all at the same time.
That they can be all woman, without excuses.
That they can be phenomenal.
This reminds me of Nelson Mandela's quote of Marriane Williamson's "Our Deepest Fear":
ReplyDelete'...We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?'
GO GIRL!
-Tania
Thank you, that's really generous. I looked up "Our Deepest Fear," thanks for inspiring me.
ReplyDelete“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Wow woman you do want it all ;-)
ReplyDeleteI am so glad that you write down all the wonderful stuff in your head and share it to the world!! I think this is a way to more than a phenomenal person that you already are... SHARING... is the keyword.
I might have a piece or two thoughts on each of your writing but I warn you in advance... I am a devil's advocate by nature... I like to provoke, turn-things-around, create debate or even 'nyentil'... but it doesn't mean I agree or disagree or have some agenda/meaning... it's just thoughts. So please don't get insulted, offended , angry or upset (I had some people want to throw bricks at me because of my 'honest' comments)
ok, great topic for opening act... you are a phenomenal lady! I am the same boat with you... not being phenomenal but in trying so hard to become a good role model for my kids. I see my parents/grandparents as role models - but not only the good ones to follow but also the bad ones to avoid.
If we present all the goods (being phenomenal) would it backfire? will it be a pressure for our kids because our shoes are too big for them to fill in (i see many offsprings of great people being looked at as mediocre compared to the parents)? or will it be a turn-off for them (i see my wonderful aunt and her 180 degree kids)? I really wonder...
love that last sentence of our deepest fear...As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. That's what I inspire to be...
ReplyDeletethe backfire thing is really an interesting thought. i never think abou that. i guess my glass is half full.... hahaha... i suppose it is all in how we do it. i need to find ways to do it as ways to inspire rather than "look at me i'm so great" and discourage my kids. and that they need to be confident of the fact that they are unique and i love them no matter what. it is not the end result that matter. it is knowing that they try to be a better person that counts.
ReplyDelete